The Boston Red Sox had to cancel their contract with Louisville Slugger, maker of high-quality baseball bats, because of fiscal mismangement. According to G. Iamdumb, VP of Business & Finances for the Red Sox Organization, "The parent club has spent too much money on player acquisitions over the past few years and it has eaten up our funding. First, we signed Manny Ramirez to a huge contract. Manny deserves it, but we can't afford it. Lately, we signed Coco Crisp and we were lucky to get him. Coco improves our CF position. But, the money has dried up. We can't afford bats anymore. The only thing we can afford are ice cream cones...so that's what we got. The parent club and all our minor league teams will use single-scoop waffle ice cream cones at the plate." Only single scoop? That is cheap! There is no truth to the rumor that Manny Ramirez ate his in the on-deck circle!